The greatest time of year.

Well today is Christmas, and I feel like I've gotten my priorities all screwed up. I've thought about me alllll day long. I haven't even stopped to think about the people in Africa, who got nothing! Or even the people down the street. While I'm sad because I didn't get the things I wanted. (Take in mind that I got an ipod touch and the chance to get a puppy when its old enough.) I feel miserable now thinking back about this morning. It's not about me! It's not even about giving gifts to people. Because thousands of years ago God gave us all the most incredible gift ever. He sent us His son. His only son. To be born of a virgin, and to grow up and die. For each and every single one of us. That was His whole life's purpose. To save me and you. And today should have not been about me. It should have been about Him. It should always be about Him.

You loved.

I never deserved you, nor your love, but you gave it anyway. Knowing I was a sinner, a hypocrite, a liar, a theif, a deceiver. You knew I wouldn't always trust Your ways. Or that I might even stray from You. You knew I wasn't perfect and that I would never be. You knew I would critisize Your children when I had no right to. You knew I might ignore You. Or curse your name. Or that that I might not even ask you to be with or near me. That I might not let You acquire my heart. Or consume me in Your awe. You were taking a risk on my response to Your love. You knew I might not surrender everything I have and everything I am to You. But You gave. You gave Your miraculous life for my worthless one. You gave Your only son for me. You gave Your love knowing I didn't have to take it and that I might not want it. You bled and You were tortured, you were made fun of and spat upon, You were emotionally and physically abused, You were stabbed and You were whipped, You walked miles and bore the cross, for me. Knowing You would die, You loved.

Floating.

I'm done searching for someone. Trying to find your other half is like being stranded in the ocean without a boat. You have no idea what to look for. If anyone is searching for you to. Or if anything is even out there or coming. And if they are, are they safe to climb aboard? Are they trustworthy enough to give your well-being to? You never really know. It's all a chance. And for most people, they think love is a game. And when they play it, they play with peoples emotions. So I'm not going to go swimming. Because when you do, you get thrashed back and forth from current to current. Not knowing where you are or where your going. I'm going to float, and ride the waves out. And if a ship comes by then it will be sent by God, and at the right time. And I'll know that its safe to climb upon. As well as surrender to. But as for now I'm floating.

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